My Thoughts

My Thoughts

Being a Seventh-day Adventist is extremely hard. However, I overcome a lot of severe hardships in my life and yes, I did become strong. I feel despite of my challenges, I’m ready for marriage. I’m blessed with the things that is going on with my life, but I would like to share with my better half. I’m fully aware that marriage is not easy. There will be trials, tribulations, life is not filled with sunshine and flowers, we are living in a real and nasty world. Cinderella life was not magical because she was abused by her own family, yet she became a strong woman for her prince. I’m not afraid to admit my mistakes and learn from them. If I have an issue, I immediately sort things out by getting help from my parents, my friends, and including my pastor. I’m fortunate to have awesome parents who instilled me those values that I need to seek out help immediately so I can solve it in a timely manner. I support President Donald J Trump 100.1%. But my parents taught me to respect other people opinions and political views. Unfortunately, this kind of disrespect which is coming from the left who are against Trump supporters has infiltrated our church and poisoned of the minds of our people. As for me, I’m willing to respect her views if her views differ from mine. Those kinds of women who doesn’t respect you or forces you to conform to her ways, they are not quality people. You have the right to be yourself, 100%! However, the thing that upsets me the most about this church (not just website) is that why am I meeting a lot of people with severe emotional issues. They are clinging to their past abusive relationships, they do not seek treatment, but still join these kinds of websites to find a “spouse” This church preaches that we are not supposed to engage in interfaith marriages or relationships. If this denomination strongly emphasizes on godly successful marriages, we should invest more on mental health in addition to our beliefs on diet, exercise, sleep, etc. I’ve been a Seventh-day Adventist since 1984, I’m very well versed that there are a lot of failed marriages.

Here is my advice to men (women can apply this) If you a strong, confident, grounded, successful who wants to love and honor her, don’t pursue her if she is not willing to meet you all the way. IF she doesn’t come up to your level by improving herself. If she leaves you because of her doubts and insecurities, don’t abandon her but do not engage in a relationship. Pray for her but encourage her to seek help and seek an activity that will keep her mind stimulated. Even if she tells you that you are too good for her, give that same advice but red flags should be waving if she does not want to have the courage. Don’t be like Forrest Gump who pursued someone who did not love him in return. There is another movie that is one of my favorites. It’s a film back from 2001, it’s called Crazy/Beautiful. Carlos, was a straight A student, bright kid, who wants to join the military after high school. He gets up early in the morning to take the bus from his east LA home to a prominent high school on the other side of town. He meets this girl who attends his school, Nicole has a lot of behavior issues due to her mother’s suicide. She has been destructive to herself but when she meets him, she turns around 90 degrees and their relationship did succeed despite of an issue that they had due to her father’s bad advice. At the beginning of their relationship, she got him in trouble, but he firmly told her that he doesn’t do those kinds of things but was attentive to her. She also had a hobby as well. Men, be that prize, not her. #BEAKING

Nicole is a real strong woman because she wanted to be free from bondage of suffering., I’m pretty sure God approves that kind of relationships based on a solid foundation.
Those are my thoughts to those who will exercise caution.
My appeal to all the women at this website, men pay close attention. To those who has been victims of past abusive relationships who are bringing baggage into the relationship that you are in. You have 2 choices. Open up to him with BIG open arms, let go of the past, get help, if you are a religious fanatic, trust God or just leave this site and don’t waste our time. Us MEN want to invest in you and seek a godly marriage. However, like I said, the Seventh-day Adventist Church needs reform in helping to those in need because we want to have a successful marriage. I’m not asking for a handout. I admit that I do have problems and want to improve. A lot people do feel the same. We are not your doormats if you decide to continue to seek the same kind of relationships that you have endured. Don’t come back to us and expect a second chance. Most of us we are living across the country, across the North American Division, or across the world. We have jobs, responsibilities, our families, our communities but we are willing to sacrifice our time, our resources so we can be with each other. Some of us guys are willing to leave everything behind so we can be with you. Love is about sacrifice, keep that in mind.
Men even don’t fall if she offers you one of her friends because in reality, she is pushing you away and putting you under a doormat. Remember, you have chosen her, not her friends. With that being said, respect our time and we will treat you like a queen. Otherwise, we would need to find other places where we can seek a wife.
Men, my last advice is that she does not want you because of her insecurities, this will be a time for you to be productive, travel, be involved in the church, keep working in your career, be with your friends, and just continue being you. It’s her loss, not yours.

Cons
The Seventh-day Adventist Church needs a lot of reform on mental health and investing more on marriages. Sermons on unequally yoked marriages are a waste of time since its all talk, no action.